Sermon: A Parent’s Loss

Let's pray before we open God's word together.

Our Father, we are thankful that you are a God who has spoken, a God who still speaks. And we are thankful that you have chosen to give us this word that is living and active. It does not return void. And we pray this morning that you would indeed, as you have promised, speak to us

as it were, that this poor preacher would fade into the background and that we would all leave this place knowing that we have heard from you, living God, you've spoken in our midst, he's spoken to each of our hearts as we have need. You filled our minds with the things of you and that we would say that we have encountered the living God today heard from him. And we pray all of this in the strong name of your son and our savior of the Lord Jesus

Christ, by the power of the Spirit. Amen. This morning, second Samuel, chapter 12, verses 14 through 23. This is the holy er, sufficient word of God, nevertheless, because by this deed, you have utterly scorned the Lord. The child who's born to you shall die. Then Nathan went to his house and the Lord afflicted the child. That Uriah's wife boarded David and he became sick. David therefore sought God on behalf of the child,

and David fasted and went in and lay all night on the ground. And the elders of his house stood beside him to raise him from the ground, but he would not, nor did he eat food with them. On the seventh day, the child died and the servants of David were afraid to tell him that the child was dead. For they said, behold, while the child was yet alive, we spoke to him and he did not listen to us. How then can we say to him, the child is dead?

He may do himself some harm, but when David saw that his servants were whispering together, David understood that the child was dead. And David said to his servants, is the child dead? They said He is dead. And David A. Rose from the earth and washed and anointed himself and changed his clothes, and he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. He then went to his own house and when he asked, they set food before him and he ate.

Then a servant said to him, what is this thing that you have done? You fasted and wet for the child while he was alive, but when the child died, you arose and ate food. He said, while the child was still alive, I fasted and wept for, I said, who knows whether the Lord will be gracious to me that the child may live and now he's dead. Why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.

Though the grass withers and the flower fades, the word of God is forever. Thanks be to God. Amen.

This is a difficult text. Uh, there's no getting around that. Uh, this is part of the reason that we preach expositional sermons and we go through books of the Bible. So the preacher can't escape from the hard text. And you as a congregation can't say, let's skip over that hard text. It's, it's a hard text. There's no getting around that. It's also an incredibly comforting text and a glorious text. And I wanna look at that this morning.

I wanna look under three points this morning as we go through this text. A gracious God greater than our sin. Second, a gracious God greatly to be trusted. And third, a gracious God of the greatest hopee. So a gracious God, greater than our sin, a gracious God greatly to be trusted. And third, a gracious God of the greatest hopee. First, a gracious God greater than our sin. Let's start with a little bit of context here.

David is the king of Israel. He has sinned, grievously. Those of you that have been here know that he committed this sin with Bathsheba Uriah's wife. And then he has Uriah put to death. He has him murdered. And you'll notice that the author calls attention to this yet again in verse 15, by calling her Uriah's wife. She's not Bathsheba, she's the wife of a dead man, and he's bringing it to the forefront. David has committed a high handed

sin, great sin. Though all sin is infinitely evil because it is committed against an infinite eternal God. There are degrees of sin. And when you think about the position and the place and the office that David holds and the sins, this string of sins that he has committed, surely it rises as one of the greatest in the history of humanity. In fact, Nathan, the prophet, makes it crystal clear in verse 14. He says this, by this deed,

you have utterly scorned the Lord. And in the Hebrew, it's fascinating. It literally reads, you've given enemies great occasion to blaspheme Yahweh.

John Owen said once, he said, the sins of believers are of another kind than the sins of the world. For they wound love the world, sins against law. The believer sins against grace. And David has wounded love mightily,

but we have a gracious God, gracious God that is greater than our sin. So we saw last week though David had sought to shroud his sin and darkness and to hide it. God in his grace would not allow that sin to be shrouded in darkness. He, he brings it to light. But even more than that, he, he not only brings it to light, he, he so pours out his grace upon David that he leads David to confession and he leads him to repentance

and he leads him turning back unto the Lord. And the result is what David can pray as a reality. Now, in Psalm 51, he experienced it. He's been purged with his hope. He's been made clean. He's been washed wider than snow. He has heard the Lord with joy and gladness his bones that were breaking under the weight of the guilt of sin. He says, now he rejoices this gracious God greater than sin has blotted out all his iniquities.

David has a clean heart even as he prays. He is a renewed spirit within him, restored to him as the joy of his salvation. God is a God who is gracious and his grace is greater than all are sin. And if that doesn't tickle your soul with delight this morning, it's because there's something wrong with your soul.

Here's David. He's committed murder. He's committed adultery. He was a man who was supposed to be the protector of the nation. And there's grace sufficient from this gracious God,

so that when the Lord tells David through Nathan that he's going to take his child, notice his response.

He turns to God.

Why? 'cause he knows him. And so he fasts and he, he lays himself on the ground and he's, he's gonna spend the night there, but not just one night. He's, he's gonna spend night after night there for six nights, for seven days. He's gonna fast on the ground and he's gonna cry out to Lord over and over. Why? Well, he tells us when the servants ask him later, verse 22, while the child was still alive, I fasted and wept for, I said,

who knows whether the Lord will be gracious to me that the child may live, he knows God to be gracious.

Now, circumstances might lead you to believe something else, not David. He knows God has been gracious to him. He also knows that consequences flow from our sin.

Like when you throw a, a rock into a lake and the the ripples go out, that there is a rippling from our sin. Sin ripples. And Nathan tells him, verse 14, the child who is born to you shall die. Now this is unique. David is the father of the nation. He's the king of Israel. He's a type of the anointed one to come. A type of that shepherd king, a type of that champion deliverer, the prophet, the psalmist, the suffering servant.

And so the Lord disciplines him in oh, this way because of his status and his position and his responsibility and his office. There's a uniqueness here, but I don't want you to miss what we see here. David knows by experience that he has a gracious God greater than our sin

suffering. When you go through suffering it, it has a, has a way of exposing your heart. It just kind of, it just kinda rips open the chest and your, your chest is just kind of bare and you can see what's really in your heart and the this suffering, this trial that David is going through, it just rips open his chest and you get a picture of his heart. Where is he at? Now

it is one of the saddest things to observe as a pastor. And people are neck deep in, in trial or suffering or going through incredible circumstances

that they, their faith doesn't seem to matter to them at all.

Crisis comes maybe not of their own making or like David of their own making and their eyes that they don't go up to heaven. And yet before that they, oh, they were such a person of professed faith and they seem to have such a tie to their religion.

But then the trial comes and says, if their faith doesn't matter or it doesn't hold any weight in these circumstances, why is that? Why does that happen? It's because they, they had a great head knowledge, but they didn't have heart knowledge.

David's not like this. He's been a horrific sinner who has experienced God and he knows God to be gracious. And so he approaches God on behalf of the life of this child. The only question in his mind is whether God is going to be gracious in this particular sense, in this particular way in sparing the life of this particular child.

So for six nights, he's on his face for six nights, he's, he's pleading for six nights. He is fasting. The elders try to get him to rise. Eat. David, stand up David, it's time to move on David.

And he remains. He fasts, he prays.

But in that seventh day, the, the, the morning sun rises and that, that palace must have been on eggshells six nights of this and oh, how tired David must have been six nights of laying on his face prostrate before the Lord praying nonstop, not sleeping, not eating, not rising.

And then we read verse 18, on the seventh day, the child died.

The prayers not answered,

but God is gracious.

That's established. He gave grace to David a sinner.

But what about saving this child?

It seems so hard, which leads to our second point. A gracious God who is greatly to be trusted, a gracious God who is greatly to be trusted.

David knows him to be gracious because he's been forgiven and now he, he just moves to simple trust.

Imagine you. You can imagine the concern of the servants in this text. They, they've were told in verse 18 that they were quote, afraid to tell him that the child was dead. What will David's response be? Who's gonna tell him? Should we even tell him

they're afraid Because he has been so distraught for six nights. They think, well now if we tell him that the child has died, he could do harm to himself, they're afraid he's going to commit suicide.

Servants are whispering.

When David's eyes rise, he sees them gathered together whispering in their little clusters and and he knows. He asked one of the hardest questions that could ever be asked a parent asking verse 19, is the child dead?

Yes is a reply.

But David's response is not what they expected. It's not what you and I would expect.

Paul was saying two Corinthians four, that great passage about the fact that that John quoted this morning, even as he was praying this morning, that you and I are jars of clay. We hold these things in jars of clay. Paul will say, there we are afflicted in every way but not crushed. We are perplexed but not driven to despair. And David is afflicted but not crushed. He's perplexed, but he's not despairing. We're told. Verse 20, look at the verbs.

He arose, washed, anointed, changed, went and worshiped and then he went home and rested and ate. Why? Because he knew this. God was worthy of trust.

He didn't receive the answer to the prayer that he desired. That's sometimes the case. Listen, it was a good prayer. Spare my child. The answer was no.

And David worshiped.

He worshiped and he rested and he ate. He had experienced that God is indeed good and worthy of trust. He knew his character. He had experienced it. He had lived it.

Don't lose sight of the big picture when the servants are troubled by his response. Verse 23, David's response is this, why should I fast now? Meaning why should I fast now that my son has died? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he will not return to me. David was a lost sinner. And yet here he expresses resurrection hope. Don't miss the big picture.

David is one that we would have trouble forgiving and yet he has peace with God. He has forgiveness, he has cleansing and he knows he's going home to be with God. He knows it.

I will go to him. He knows this gracious God who saved him. And thus David knows that he is worthy of trust. There are times that you and I just going through life have to look up and we have to say, my gracious God, I don't understand,

If he saved my soul, that which is eternal, I can trust him with the transient things of life. Even the hardest of things

John Newton once wrote. He said, everything is needful that he sins nothing can be needful that he withholds.

Now that's easy to say. It's quite another to live that

John Owen said, well, you're gonna gimme another one. Yeah, he lost 10 of 11 children. 10 of 11

doesn't get harder than that. And he said this to those to whom Christ is the hope of future glory. He is also the life of present grace. If he gave us the hope of future glory, he's given you that

then you can trust him in the present to give you sufficient grace.

A gracious God greater than our sin, a gracious God who is greatly to be trusted. Finally, a gracious God of the greatest hope.

David's response is, I shall go to him, but he will not return to me. He, he knows God to be greater than even death. David knows that he will go to be with his son, that he's only been taken from him for a time. Now there are those in the history of the church that have argued that what David is saying here is that he's going to be with his son when he says he is going to be with him. He's speaking about going to the grave

or he's talking about going to death. That's nonsense. Well, how do you know that, Jason? Because that provides no comfort. That provides no hope. That provides no peace. No, David's convinced here. And he knows in fact, when Absalom, David's grown wicked son dies, David Mourns because he feared that Absalom was condemned. Here he expresses hope that this young covenant child is with God. David knows he knows that he will see him again

because David will go to be with him. And where is David going when he dies with God? Where is this child with God?

You say, well what does David base set upon Now two things.

One, as we discussed the waters of baptism this morning, he is a covenant keeping God and he makes covenantal promises. And when God entered into a covenant with Abraham in Genesis 12 and 15 and 17, Genesis 15 and 17, he makes the promise. And that is the unfolding, the beginning of the unfolding of the great covenant of grace. That is the overarching story of all of human history. He says to Abraham there in Genesis 17,

and I will establish my covenant between me and you and your offspring after you throughout their generations to be an everlasting covenant, to be a God to you and to your offspring. And that thread weaves its way all the way through the scriptures. And then Peter, on that great day in Acts two, as we just mentioned, he's preaching Pentecost, the spirit is being poured out upon the church. And what does he do? He quotes those exact same words from

Genesis 17 in Acts two, for the promise is for you and for your children. He's a covenant keeping God. He's a God to us and to our children.

Second is that David knows the very character of God's. What you sung this morning, he's strong and kind. He's gracious and kind. David has experienced it and he knows him to be such. He has a covenant promises. He has a very gracious, kind character of God. And you and I not only have those two testimonies, we have David's testimony. He knows it. He knows that our covenant children dying in infancy, go home to be with the Lord

and we will go to be with them forever. He knows it. His covenant of promises, his character. And you have the testimony of David.

Why would he take him home? It seems too early for us.

I don't know. The struggle we have is with timing. 'cause everybody dies. You're dying.

Our struggle is with the timing.

Why so soon? We don't know.

What we do know is that our gracious God spared them when they die in infancy or die in the womb.

Say what? Spared him. Jason. Yeah. He spared them the ravages of sin and experiencing all the wickedness of this world. Our loss is truly their gain. It doesn't make the loss less significant. It doesn't make it less painful, but it does make it more bearable.

Some of our covenant children lost in the womb or lost in infancy. You realize they never suffered a stubbed toe, persistent cough, a cancer diagnosis. They never experienced the pain of loneliness or rejection or slander or hatred or even hunger.

They never had a restless night due to conflict or fear or even a guilty conscience.

They were spared so many of the miseries of this world in a very real sense. We could say that they went from life to life. They went from life in the womb or immediately outside of the womb to truly life abundant in the very presence of the Lord Jesus Christ, gazing upon his glory and raptured by his love and his peace and his joy and his kindness and his strength and his protection, his person forever.

Again, it doesn't make the law so significant or painful, but it does make it more bearable.

And that's only possible because we have a gracious God of the greatest hope.

And it's a true hope that this is not a Pollyannish hope. David's not walking around with a Pollyannish hope here, just wishful kind of thinking. No. Why? Because our father sent his son into this world to die and he died for sinners hung upon that tree for sinners and he was put in the grave for sinners and he was raised on the third day and ascended to the right hand of the Father. It's a true hope, a fixed hope.

He's triumphed over the grave. Death is lost. Its sting. It's a conquered enemy. It's a neutered adversary.

David knows this. He knows it. I will go to him.

But let's be clear, death still entails loss. That's why David pled so much. So what do we do with the loss?

We'll notice that David grieves in the midst of the loss. Grief has a real place in the Christian life. He, he's crying out too often. Too many well-meaning Christians will saddle up next to someone that is going through a trial or going through suffering or going through incredible loss. And they'll saddle up next to 'em and they'll say, you know, God works all things together for the good of those who are called according to his purpose.

True. You see that here? These elders are trying to get David to get up. Get up, David. Come on. Time to move on. God decree it. It's right. It's biblical. It's true, but it's the right biblical truth at the right, wrong time. This is job's. Friends

suffering and death are true enemies. So grief has a real place. We mourn with those who mourn and we weep with those who weep. It's okay to say, it's even right to say, you know what? This is very hard and I'm so very sorry. And that's it.

We weep with those who weep. We mourn with those who warm. Remember when Jesus is out Lazarus tomb, he goes to Lazarus tomb there in John 11. And as he is there, he weeps. He knows that he's going to raise Lazarus from the grave and he weeps. Why? Because Martha and Mary are weeping. We weep with those who weep. We mourn with those who mourn. As a Christian, we don't stay there in time. I'm comforting my brother and sister in Christ

with the truth that Christ says, the victory that he's worthy of trust, that he rose from the grave. And death has loss of sting. We have resurrection hope, but we allow people to mourn. We allow people to grieve. And we understand that there may be all kinds of waves of grief and it may take time. It may even be such a severe loss and such a severe trial that this is a grief that sticks with them all through the course of their life.

Believing that we have a gracious God of the greatest hope does not mean that we shun grief. In fact, this is one of the reasons that the Lord bless the church with the diaconate, our diaconate, is to lead the way. In this as our book of church order, I think wonderfully says, it says about the deacons, it says that they have a ministry of sympathy and service sympathy because there's a need for sympathy. And they lead us in this sympathy.

Sympathy is needed for people who know the hope of this gracious God. So our diaconate helps people to mourn. It comes alongside of people and helps make them plan their funeral arrangements and provides a meal after a funeral, not a life celebration, a funeral

and and helps them through the grieving process.

Our book of church order speaks about the fact that they are to minister to any who may be in distress. It's their duty also to develop the grace of liberality in the members of the church. They lead us in intending to those that are hurting, that are grieving, that are mourning, that are suffering in our midst. And we do this together. This is one of the beauties of the church. You do this together,

church mourns with those who mourn even as we hope

and as we do so it's good to be reminded. Newton once said, he said, when we get safely home, we shall not think we have done and suffered too much along the way.

You'll never think that when you get there.

So very true. We hope there's that which we cannot lose. And David understands that in our text. He's, he's experienced great loss, but he has God because this gracious God has him. And he will see his son again. I shall go to him. He knows this gracious God is greatly to be trusted and he knows him to be his greatest hope. Even in the midst of this horrific loss,

he knows, he knows that God's goodness is greater still. That what you and I lose here because of sin, our own sin or because of other sins or because the effects of sin in the world, in its fallen world. We only lose for a time. But what we enjoy there, we enjoy forever.

Forever.

'cause we have such a gracious God

closed with this little story from Newton, from one of his letters. Listen, you can't do this on the Sabbath day. No buying this on the Sabo day. But tomorrow if you've not read Newton's letters, buy them and then read them. Uh, but he wrote a letter to someone that had lost a loved one. Oh, I spent all week trying to find it, never found it. Um, but he wrote a letter to someone that was lost, a loved one, one of their family members.

And he was reflecting upon John 14 when, when Jesus says, I go to prepare a place for you

and in my father's home or in my father's house, there are many mansions. And he's reflecting upon that. And he asked the question. He says, well, what, what makes something home? Makes it a house, a home? And he said, is it not this? Is it not the people? That's what makes it home.

So Newton's reflecting upon that as he's writing to this person that has lost a family member.

And he said, could it not be this, that part of what Jesus is doing as he says, he goes to prepare a place for us.

It's that part of the way that he prepares a place for us is that he takes some of the people that we love in this life there before us, so that when we are there, it's all the more home as we're welcomed.

He's not coming back to me, but I'm going to Him.

And that beautiful revelation 2021, where the new city, Jerusalem is coming down out of heaven and God makes his home with us forever. It's home. It's home.

We'll be home with those we love and with those who have loved us and with the one who has so graciously loved us from eternity, gracious God greater than our sin, greatly to be trusted and who is our greatest hope. I will go to be with him. Pray. You know this God, this gracious God this morning I experience with your whole heart. Let's pray.

Father, we bow before you this morning, thankful that you are a God who is triumphed over all of our enemies and the person of your son, including death. You are so gracious, you would take such sinners and that you would bring us home to you forever.

Oh, I pray that it would be true of every soul in this room, every soul that is tuned in on video, that there would not be one that is lost. That every single one would be able to say, I know that his grace is greater than my sin. I trust in this gracious God and truly this gracious God is my great hope. What a God you are. And what a delight it is to be your people. Look to you with the eyes of faith this morning and say, you alone are refuge and our strong tower

and our fortress, and we pray all of this in the strong name of Christ. Amen.