Sermon: An Abominable Deed

I am gonna ask you to take a copy of God's word this morning and we're going to turn open to the book of Second Samuel as we continue our way through that book. If you want to turn right to page 2, 6 3 in the Bible in front of you in the Pew Rat 2 6 3 this morning we are looking at Second Samuel chapter 12 verse 24, all the way through chapter 13, verse 22, 2 6 3 in the Pew Bible chapter 12 verse 24 through 1322.

Very hard text this morning seems to be a theme in Second Samuel. So let's pray before we open God's word together.

Our Father, we do come before you this morning as those who are destitute, we're beggars, we're spiritually impoverished apart from you dispensing your mercy and grace to sinner such as us. And so we come before you with open hands and we come before you with hearts crying out and saying, pour out upon us. Your grace tend to us as you have promised by your word. We pray it would be living and active in our midst. Your spirit would be

busy about our souls this morning that your son would intercede for us, knowing what each of us has need for this morning and that you as a gracious and kind and good father as you've promised, administer to us by your power and by your grace as we each have need and as only you can we pray all of this in the strong name of Christ. Amen. Two Samuel chapter 12 verse 24 through 1322. This is the holy iner, sufficient word of God.

Then David comforted his wife Bathsheba and went into her and lay with her and she bore sun and he called his name Solomon and the Lord loved him and sent a message to Nathan, the prophet. So he called his name Jedediah because of the Lord. Now Joab fought against rabah of the Ammonites and took the royal city and Joab sent messengers to David and said, I have fought against Rabah, moreover, I have taken the city of waters now then

gather the rest of the people together and camp against the city and take it lest I take the city and it be called by my name. So David gathered all the people together and went to Rabah and fought against it and took it and he took the crown of their king from his head. The weight of it was a talent of gold and in it was a precious stone and it was placed on David's head and he brought out the spoil of the city a very great amount

and he brought out the people who were in it and set them to labor with saws and iron picks and iron axes and made them toil at the brick kilns and thus he did to all the cities of the Ammonites and David and all the people returned to Jerusalem. Now Absalom, David's son had a beautiful sister whose name was Tamar, and after a time Amon, David's son loved her and Amon was so tormented that he made himself ill because of his sister Tamar, for she was a virgin

and it seemed impossible to Amon to do anything to her. But Amon had a friend whose name was Jonah Dab, the son of Shaima, David's brother. And Jonah Dab was a very crafty man and he said to him, oh son of the king, why are you so haggard morning after morning? Will you not tell me? Nan said to him, I love Tamar. My brother, Absalom's sister Jonah Dab, said to him, lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. When your father comes to see you, say to him,

let my sister Tamar come and give me bread to eat and prepare the food in my sight that I may see it and eat from her hand. So Nan lay down and pretended to be ill. And when the king came to see him, Nan said to the king, please let my sister Tam marcom and make a couple of cakes in my sight that I may eat from her hand. Then David sent home to Tamar saying, go to your brother Nan's house and prepare food for him. So Tamar went to her brother Nan's house

where he was lying down and she took dough and kn it and made cakes in a sight and baked the cakes and she took the pan and emptied it out before him, but he refused to eat and Amon said, send out everyone from me. So everyone went out from him. Then Amon said to Tamar, bring the food into the chamber that I may eat from your hand. And Tamar took the cake she had made and brought them into the chamber to Nan her brother.

But when she brought them near to him, he took hold of her and said to her, come lie with me my sister. She answered him, no, my brother, do not violate me for such a thing is, is not done in Israel. Do not do this outrageous thing as for me. Where could I carry my shame? And as for you, you would be as one of the outrageous fools in Israel Now therefore please speak to the king for he will not withhold me from you. But he would not listen to her and being stronger than she.

He violated her and lay with her. Then Amon hated her with very great hatred. So the hatred of which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amon said to her, get up go. She said to him, no, my brother for this wrong and sending me away is greater than the other that you did to me. But he would not listen to her. He called the young man who served him and said, put this woman out of my presence in both the door

after her as she was wearing a long robe with sleeves, thus were the virgin daughters of the king dressed. So servant put her out and both of the door after her and Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the long robe that she wore and she laid her hand on her head and went away crying aloud as she went and her brother Absalom said to her, has Amon your brother been with you? Now hold your peace my sister, he is your brother.

Do not take this to heart. So Tamar lived a desolate woman in her brother Absalom's house. When King David heard of all these things, he was very angry, but Absalom spoke to Amon. Neither good nor bad for Absalom hated Amon because he had violated his sister. Tamar, though the grass withers and the flower fades, the word of God is forever. Thanks be to God. Amen.

For the past few weeks we have looked at the doctrine of sin and we're going to do so again this morning from, in my opinion what is one of the worst scenes in the scriptures. But first we have these two little peries before we get into the abominable and horrific account of of Amon and what he did to Tamar. The first is the birth of Solomon. You'll remember from last week that the child that was conceived from David's sin with Bathsheba, the Lord

took, and now David has gone into Bathsheba again and they have conceived a second child. And so the question that must have gone through both of their minds is, would the Lord also take this child? And they get a very clear answer in verse 25, the Lord loved him. This child would live and this child would not only live, this child would reign and this child would not only rain this child would be a blessing to the nation of Israel

and would be a blessing to the entire region around it. And and that's a, it's a wonderful balm on the heels of what we just read last week and had to wrestle through in the text last week because it's a true sign to you that is put here that God does not forget his covenantal promises, that he doesn't forsake what he has promised to do, sin does not reign and there is no sins so big that it cannot be forgiven and that is incredibly important

as we move into this text this morning. It's a good bomb. The second Perpe picks back up the story of Israel's great enemy, the Ammonites, and you have to go all the way back to chapter 10 to remember what's going on with the Ammonites. They were the focus before, but now that entire cycle, a battle with the Ammonites has been interrupted and it's been interrupted because of the sin that David committed with Bathsheba

and the killing of her husband Uriah. And then here it comes to a close with just a, a very brief account that they triumphed over the Ammonites. They've, they've taken the capital city of the Ammonites for ba, they they've conquered them, they've been laid to waste, but it's just a very brief account and then all of a sudden we're back to all the sin and David's house and all the sin that flows from David's house, but,

but it's no small victory. That's what's so fascinating. These are our enemies and it's shown in the text that this is no small victory that Joab is calling David to the front saying, listen, you, you must be the one that takes this city.

It's not only that the amount of plunder they take from the city speaks of its wealth and then you look at the crown, the weight of the crown, it demonstrates the power that these ammonites possessed. And yet again the account is very brief.

It's as if the writer is saying to the people of God, us this morning, the enemies without are slight compared to the enemies within because immediately we're back to the enemies within

God's. People often get more worked up by the enemies without than those within.

Let's be clear, your greatest opponent, your greatest enemy is not some opponent to the church. It's not some political figure, it's not some ideology nor some false religion, but it's the traitor that lurks within

sin is within and it seeks to betray you, to compromise your mind, to compromise your heart, to compromise your soul, to carry you off. And that's why the authors spend so much time on sin and why we're spending so much time on sin.

John Owen once commented saying this, he said, A wise government will first take care of traitors in their own land because they know that if betrayed all that they do against their known enemies will be futile. As he said, it is this internal futility of mind that does its best to betray us, to weaken us, to hinder the work of grace in us and to open the door of our hearts to our cursed enemies. If we do not make every effort to discover, suppress

and destroy the traitor, we shall not have the victory in our spiritual warfare. Ammonites are dangerous, sin is deadly. Ammonites are ferocious, sin is fatal.

And you see thankfully that David confessed, he repented, he turned back to the Lord in faith and there was grace for that sin. But now we enter into this fallout froing from David's sin and we're going to see that his son am none, does not confess, he does not repent. He does not turn back to the Lord. God granted forgiveness to David. He is clean before the Lord and yet there are going to be consequences that flow from David's life, from the sin

that he committed. The Lord made it clear to him in chapter 12 verses nine through 10, the sword shall never depart from your house because you despise me and have taken the wife of Uriah, the Hittite to be your wife. There are still consequences.

And now we enter this horrific scene in chapter 13 and some of the consequences we get a a picture of the ruinous nature of sin. Here we read Absalom. David's son had a beautiful sister whose name was Tamar Amar. Absalom is mentioned first because he is the brother of Tamar. It's a little odd because Amon is mentioned second and you would expect him to be mentioned first because Amon is the oldest son. He's the heir apparent to the throne,

but he comes, they come from different mothers. Absalom and Amon. They have the same father David, Absalom and Tamar are full brother and sister and Amon is their half brother. Her it is one of the most painful narratives in scripture. Been working through it all week. It has not been enjoyable.

Nan were told in verse two, so lusted after this half sister of his Tamar that it, it made him physically ill and that's our first point this morning. Sin sickens. Sin sickens.

It's a mercy of the Lord that often there is a pain that accompanies sin. Sometimes it's physical but often it's a pain of conscience where you have that little sting and it's a a great mercy of the Lord to awaken us to the deadlines of sin. Emden could have ended his physical pain by killing the sin that was racking him, but he was a man ruled by his passions.

He's no better than a beast. He not only allowed sin to tantalize him but grab him and and take root in him and then bud in him and flower in him and then spread out its tentacles in him like a disease and and just capture him.

Act like a beast.

Christian, you are not a beast.

You're not to be ruled by your passions.

That's who you were. It's not who you are.

Apostle Paul says, we once lived in the passions of our flesh carrying out the desires of the body and the mind and we're by nature children of wrath like the rest of mankind. We once lived in the passions of our flesh. No longer you've been set free.

That's Romans six. Sin no longer sits enthroned on your heart. It no longer has dominion over you.

You say, well this is just who I am. No, it's not who you are. You're a new creature in Christ, a new creation.

Sin has no dominion over your person. You can kill it by the strength and the power of the one who dwells in you. Sin sickens. You feel its pain, you uproot it,

be killing sin or sin will be killing you.

Amnon should have killed it at its root. How?

Well principally the best way is directing your soul to view the opposite. To enjoy the opposite. You just sang it. Do you believe it? He is my delight and my reward that you find Jesus so lovely, so beautiful

that he's set before you.

Peter says it this way in one Peter one, though you have not seen him, you love him though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls. You enjoy the opposite. You find Jesus so lovely that you can delight in him, that as Peter says, you rejoice with that joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory.

How do you do that? Well, you have to stir it. You, you foster it. How Well God has told you He works by means He He gives you greater delight in him by his means. He's given you the word and prayer and the sacraments

and the word and prayer and sacraments. They inflame within you that faith and that desire and that loveliness of Christ.

Which means if you are not here week and week out, you're not serious about delighting in Christ. You're not serious about killing sin no matter what you protest because he ministers through the preach word and the prayers of his people and the sacraments.

If if you're not regularly in the scriptures and prayer daily in your personal life, then you are not serious about delighting in Christ. You're not serious about killing sin.

He works through his means.

Why settle and delight in that which is transit and fading and limited you. You've been given the eternal, the glorious

anon. Amon though like a beast, he's driven by his, his passions or began as a spirituality becomes a physical affliction and apparently was observable because we find in verse three that a friend and cousin Jonah Dabb noticed, inquired as to why Amon was quote So haggard morning after morning and that leads to our second point. Sin blinds it blinds Amon is not seen clearly.

The author tells us in verse three that Jonah Daab was quote a, a very crafty man. He counts Amon counts Jonah Daab as a friend, but he's no friend.

Be careful who you count as friends. JC Ry in his wonderful little book, thoughts for young men that isn't just for young men. Everybody should read it. Incredibly helpful little book. He said this, never make an intimate friend of anyone who is not a friend of God. Amen and amen. If you have intimate friends or not friends of God, you're in a dangerous place.

I'm not talking about acquaintances, talking about friends. Why would you ever want to be friends? Intimate friends with someone who is not pointing your soul to God and no one believer is going to point your soul to God, but they will guide you. They will influence you, they will shape you. As RAs said, the devil has few better helps in ruining a man's soul than the harm that is done by associating with godless, companions and friends.

Sin will blind you to where you treat an enemy like they are a friend, a threat to your soul as a welcome advisor.

Are they pointing you to Christ?

Sin was in Amman's heart. He had a traitor within and now an enemy without helps to secure the victory. He just lets down that that gate and and he comes

and Jonah dab comes up with this elaborate scheme and Amos line and deceit and treachery and violence more sin and Amon is happily shaped by it blind.

He deceives all those around. He plays sick. He ask David the king and father to send Tamar to him. David sins for Tamar and she appears at Nan's house in verse eight. We find her taking dough and needing it and making cakes for her brother to help him to recover So she thinks and she empties the cakes out. He refuses to eat plays the sick man.

He's launched into Jonah Dabbs crafty plan. He has everyone leave so that there's only he and Tamar that are left. They are now alone. She leads to our third point Sin violates.

Violates. He asks her to bring him food again and she comes from that outer chamber into the inner chamber.

Verse 11, we read. He took hold of her.

His passion is led to deceit and now his deceit has led to violence and he grabs hold of his sister and he demands, come lie with me. My sister

Tamar is honorable in every way she pleads. No, my brother, she reminds of the relation

then she reminds that they are of the people of God. She says, for such a thing is not done in Israel. Then she reminds that this action is sin. Do not do this outrageous thing. This is a violation of God's law, fornication, incest, rape.

Then she reminds of the personal violation. Verse 13, as for me, where could I carry my shame? Brother, your violence against me will affect my life.

And then she reminds him of how it will personally violate him. As for you, you would be as one of the outrageous fools in Israel. She says, sin violates relations. It violates God's law. It violates others. It violates self doing this outrageous thing she says would make you counted among the outrageous fools she sees clearly

she would be violated, they would be purveyors of incest. He would be a rapist. He is in essence giving up the throne.

How could an incest rapist adulterer occupy the throne? What a fool, an evil wicked fool,

which leads to our fir fourth point

sin deifies to make up a word that his sin makes you stupid.

The author tells us in verse 14, he would not listen to her sin. Deifies makes you stupid.

He does the outrageous

wish. I could tell you how many times I have sat with someone and sitting across from them and they have done the outrageous

and sitting there and they will say, I never thought I would be here.

The outrageous and the unimaginable becomes reality in their life because sin was allowed to take up root.

You say, I'd never could,

but you can maybe even will

unless you are constantly by God's grace and the strength of Christ, the king, and by the influence of the Holy Spirit seeking to put death to sin over and over and over and daily, daily, daily.

It should never be named among mankind, let alone the people of God erupts an amman's life

and oh, poor Tamar.

I was looking up statistics this week.

It's widely reported that one out of every six American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime.

One in six. It's reported that at least 10 million men and women suffer from domestic abuse each day and up to 85% of the victims of domestic abuse are women and and or young girls. Abuse has no place in the world, let alone among the people of God.

And let's be clear, we're talking across the board

whether that's verbal, emotional, physical, sexual. It should, as the apostle says, not even be named among you.

If you're engaged in such sin, it's in your house. It has to stop immediately.

Immediately

sin that has to be killed.

I want to address abuse this morning from this pastor and I want to address this in two clear ways. First, men protect the women in your world.

Protect the women in your world.

This is not a nice social custom that you adapt if you want to. It's not something you do. If you have enough margin, it's your duty.

Adam failed to protect even the garden and the garden folds. And that's but a picture of every single realm, whether in a garden, a family, a nation, or a culture. When men abandon their duty to protect women, that garden, that family, that nation or that culture is on its way to destruction.

It's not a win for women and it's not a win for our nation that women are in combat roles. It's not a win for women or our culture that men now seemingly feel freer to speak to women as they speak to men or to push them or even punch a woman like they would a man if they've been offended by them. Hold a door open,

be kind, be gentle, protect.

Peter says in one Peter three to husbands show honor to the woman as a weaker vessel am non abandoned. His duty, Jonah dab abandoned his duty. David abandoned his duty. It's your duty

in order to be the strength and the protection, not the cause of harm and destruction of the women in their world.

The picture that often goes to my mind along these lines is when Lee and I lived in North Carolina, we had a starter home and that little starter home, uh, there was a day that was in the home and Leah asked me to take the trash outside and the trash can was on the other side of the home. And I looked outside and it was raining outside and so I took that trash bag and the starter home had a little awning that ran all the way around the home.

And so I remember taking that trash bag and then putting my back up against the wall of the home and just edging my way all the way around the house to throw away the trash bag. Now did I get a little bit of the rain and a little bit of the wind? Yeah, but that awning, just that little covering it, it just kept the brunt of the force from hitting me.

That's the covering. That's what a husband is to be to his wife. He can't stop her from from getting all things, but he is to protect her. He is just that. She doesn't get the brunt of it. That's what a husband does for his wife. That's what a father does for his daughters. That's what men going out to combat for the nation do for the women of the nation.

David continues to fail to protect the women in his world. Here he hears what happens and he just simply gets angry. No action, no rebuke, no discipline. He's a father, he's a king. The law was violated. Incest, rape, justice should have been upheld. Fatherly discipline for the good of unknown soul should have been exercised. This was not grace, this was not love. This was cowardice.

Say, well, he had committed adultery himself and so he was morally compromised. He's a king and a father. Justice needs to be uphold. Discipline should have been enacted

and Tamar suffers and Amon is ruined and Absalom will be ruined. Men protect the women in your world.

Second, let's address the pain,

especially women that have been abused, abused or violated.

Verses 15 through 17 are hard to read.

Verse 15, the Amon hated her with a very great hatred. So the hatred of which he hated her was greater than the love with which he loved her and it's evidence. In his response, he his response, he says, get up, go. And she knows what this means for her in the ancient world. So she pleads with him. She, she recalls the relationship, no, my brother for this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you did to me.

And and his response is absolutely abominable. Verse 17, he calls in a servant. He says, put this woman out from me, from my presence and both the door after her, but woman is not there in the Hebrew.

It's actually at the very beginning. It's just an interjection here and you can see him just pointing at her Here, put this out away from me. It's like she's trash, she's refuge. She's some kind of manje dog.

She is rightfully wrecked.

There are a few greater pains in this life than being violated by someone that is close to you, especially in this way, which it's often those who are close. So she puts ashes on her head. She tears her clothes, she weeps

in a room of this size. There are many dozens and dozens and dozens in this room

that have been impacted by such sin.

Some personally violated family member or friend violated.

Let's start here. If there's anyone that's suffering this way, now you have to let someone know.

You say, well, the Lord knows he does and he's given you the church. You let someone know.

You say, well, what about honoring my husband or honoring my father or honoring my brother? This silence does not honor them,

nor is it holiness to continue to suffer in this way.

Abuse has a way of confusing the mind. You're in something like this and in it for a period of time and it has a way of making you think what is an outrageous thing is normative.

It's an outrageous thing.

Tamar recognized it for what it was.

Women here at URC, you have pastors wives that are available. You have elders, wives that are available. We put in the newsletter every week one of the assistants to the deacons, their name and contact information so that they are available.

You let someone know the Lord has given you the church. Your suffering is not yours alone

and the Lord has given you himself. He's not forgotten you. He's not forsaken you. He's not left you. Psalm says in Psalm nine, nine, the Lord is a refuge for the oppressed. He's a a stronghold in times of trouble.

He's a refuge for the oppressed.

As Tamar expresses in this passage, there's often a sense of guilt or a sense of shame as she's expressing here that comes along with abuse or that comes with incest or that comes with rape and it should not be for the abused.

Let's try and differentiate between these a little bit. Guilt and shame. Guilt is about doing the wrong thing. You've done nothing wrong.

Shame is feeling you are the wrong thing. You are nothing wrong.

Shame and guilt are different, and that guilt is about standing. Shame is about how we think others view us. You should have no guilt and there should be no shame. The guilt is not yours, just as the shame should not be yours.

It was not. Tamars shouldn't have been in scripture. The the opposite of shame over and over throughout the scriptures is honor

and dear sister in Christ, you have all honor because you have Christ.

He came into this world and identified with us and then the writer of Hebrew says that for the joy that was set before him, he endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of God the Father. And then the writer says this, consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself so that you may not grow weary or faint hearted. He experienced the shame

and grants you the honor, you have it

in Christ. You're a child of God. You're an inheritor with the saints in light.

He says in Isaiah 62, you shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the Lord in a royal diadem. In the hand of your God. You are a crown of beauty in his hands

and Zephaniah three he says, he will rejoice over you with gladness. He will quiet you by his love. He will exalt over you with loud singing. You are his beloved. He says, over and over throughout the scriptures. In Revelation 21, you are told that you are part of his bride. In Ephesians five, he tells you that he gave himself up for this bride having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word so that he might present the church

to himself in splendor without spot or wrinkle or any such thing that she might be without blemish. He rejoices over you. He gives you honor. He considers you his crown and his joy, and he loves you with an everlasting love. Why? Because you are part of his bride. You are his woman and he protects this woman

and loves her for all of eternity.

Sin does not win.

We spend so much time on sin here in Second Samuel home. My goodness, we have so much more to go through and it can feel like, ha, it doesn't win. It hasn't won. He's conquered. He has the victory. He's taken the capital and all of it, and we're just waiting for his return upon the clouds when he brings his bride home to enjoy his everlasting love and peace forever. And sin will be no more. It will not be there. It's gone because he

tries, he wins.

It's a great hope today. It's a great is today your great peace today?

If you are in Christ,

you're part of his bride forever. Let's pray.

Father, we are thankful for so great to salvation, for so great to sinners. Sin does not win no matter how heinous it is that we have one who is greater still

and whose life was more perfect still, whose death was more abundant in mercy still, and oh how we look to him with the eyes of faith this morning, thankful that you are a God who is conquered and we look forward to the day when sin shall be. No more shall be cast into that everlasting pit. No longer shall these things be named among us. May we all know that freedom and that joy and that hope that is in Christ, that bride groom

who has protected and does protect his bride now and for all of eternity. It's in his strong name we pray. Amen.